


If I die now before I wake up

by Ghost_Writer



Category: Swimming RPF
Genre: Angst, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Slow Build
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-01
Updated: 2015-02-19
Packaged: 2018-03-04 18:00:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3078383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ghost_Writer/pseuds/Ghost_Writer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>If I die now before I wake up</em><br/><em>Ask myself - did I give enough love?</em><br/><em>Looking in when you're on the outside<br/></em>
  <em>Ask yourself - do you really love life?</em>
</p>
<p>Now swimming is gone nothing matters in Michael's life. The one thing that made him feel alive is gone until he realizes that there has always been something, someone that has made him feel alive more than swimming ever could but he has always taken that person for granted.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first attempt at slowbuild. Tried to make all the medical stuff as realistic as possible (most stuff i learnt from watching ER)
> 
> Set in November 2012
> 
> Title from the song Love Life by Take That

Michael wanders around his condo absent mindedly scratching his stomach through his tshirt trying to remember where he left his laptop or when he last had it. He finds the power cord thrown on the kitchen table he has never actually used but his mum insisted he got for 'family' occasions He wanders around his condo a few more times followed by Stella who seems delighted her dad is home again. He scratches his faces and runs his had along his chin pleased with the beard he is currently trying to grow, mainly out of laziness but more importantly just to get a reaction out of Ryan.

After his second attempt to find his laptop he gives up and walks into his living room ignoring the mess and wonders when his cleaning lady is coming again. He turns on television to drown out the silence in the room that makes it painfully aware that he is alone, sad and alone. Not that he is going to admit that to anyone, no to the outside world he is fully enjoying his retirement, although his head hasn't always been as pleased about his activities he is living life to the fullest.

He lets himself fall back on the sofa and jawns the jet lag from the last few weeks of travelling finally setting in. He leans back and closes his eyes just listening to the broadcaster on the news talking about the latest events when he hears Ryan's name been mentioned. He wonders what shit Ryan has pulled this time but the he hears the words 'accident' and 'admitted to hospital'. He feels his heart sink. The reporter doesn't seem to know much just that Ryan had been admitted to hospital in critical condition. He stares at the televisionscreen long after the segment about Ryan is finishes. He is finally pulled back to reality by Herman barking at him.

He pulls his phone out of his pocket letting it drop twice in his panick to phone Ryan so he can tell him that it is one cruel joke. It goes straight to voicemail. He starts to leave a message but hangs up. He forces himself to count backwards in French the same way Bob made him do alll the times he was pissed because he lost to try to get his breathing back to normal.

His phone vibrates in his hand. And for a smal moment he thinks it is Ryan going to make fun of him for his fucked message.

It's Hilary. "Michael" she says and he knows she knows.  "Hilary I"

"You want me to come pick up Stella and Herm" she asks like she read his mind. He needs knowing she can't see it but knows he means yes

"You start packing and see what the first flight out to Gainsville is. I will be over as quick as I can"

"Thank you" he whispers before hanging up. The moment he hangs up his phones starts vibrating receiving message after message asking if he heard about Ryan or if he knows how he is.

He want to tell them to fuck of and leave him alone, he wants to message them that he doesn't fucking know but he is paralized to the spot. The next thing he knows is that Hilary is standing in front of him snapping him back to reality. 'Michael" she says ''Michael'' she says almost in a whisper ''Michael you okay?'' she has a hand on his arm and it feels safe and warm. He takes a shaky breath. 

''What if he...'' he starts but Hilary cuts him off ''He is going to be fine Michael. You're going to go down to see him and you're gonna see that he is allright''  
  
Michael nods still not sure ''I...'' he starts but it turns into a sob.

Hilary nods like she knows what he was going to say. There are two people in the whole world who know him one being Ryan, the other being Hilary. ''Go get your stuff I will book you a flight. Michael it is going to be okay''

Michael takes another breath ''Thank you'' he says pulling her into a hug ''Thank you'' he whispers again holding onto her like his life is depending on it. 

''It is gonna be okay'' she says rubbing his back. He doesn't reply he just closes his eyes hoping that when he opens them he is in his bed and all of this has been just a dream.

The airport is quiet, he managed to get himself on the last flight out of Baltimore, it took a lot of 'now you listen here' and 'don't you know who my brother is' on Hilary's behalf to get on this flight. Only a few passengers are waiting for the same flight, there is cleaning lady is going around cleaning out the bins but apart from that the place is empty and desserted. Nobody seems to give him any notice, there is a young couple sitting a few chairs a cross from him. The girl is a sleep with her head on the boys shoulder as the boy absentmindedly plays with her hair and he feels a pang of jealousy.

He checks his phone for updates for what feels like the 100th time. Still nothing, still no news about how Ryan might be doing or if he is still alive. I mean they would report if he had died if.... he pinches the top of his leg to snap him back, to get himself to stop thinking about that. He focusses on the television across the room playing a rerun of some reality television show.  After what feels like days his flight is called.  

 

Ryan's mum is waiting for him at the hospital when he finally arrives. He feels like he has been awake for ever. Ryan's mum looks how he feels. Her eyes are red and her skin is pale. ''Thank you for coming'' she says as he walks into the waitingroom. Most of Ryan's family has headed home only his mum and sisters remain.

''What happend'' he asks sitting down as Megan hands him a cup of coffee.

Ike sits down next to him ''They don't know he collapsed during practice and hit his head.  All we know is that he has a severe concussion and there is some swelling in his brain.''

''Fuck that sounds serious'' Michael whispers looking down at his coffee ''He is going to be allright, right I mean this is Ryan we are talking about''

Ike looks like she is about to cry again ''They don't know he hasn't regained consciousness since the ambulance got to him. They are still trying to figure what made him collapse''

Michael swallows trying to take everything in ''How long has he been in here?''

''Since this morning, he collapsed during practice''

''Can I go see him'' Michael asks not sure if he will be able for it.

Ike nods ''I will take you to him myself''

 

''Hi'' he wispers into the empty room. He waits a few minutes before he continues ''I came the moment I found out''.  There is no reply, the room is entirely quiet apart from the heart monitor that has a regular steady beep.  Ike had let him go in himself to give him some privacy. He inches his way towards the bed, a part of him hopes Ryan wakes up just to tell him to fuck off but he doesn't.  When he reaches the bed it finally hits him how serious Ryan's condition is even though there isn't a scratch on him. He has a machine breathing for him and he is hooked up to several different machines and IV-bags.  The room is white and sterille. Ryan would hate it and demand to be moved Michael thinks to himself as he looks around the room. Ryan's bag is on the floor in the corner. His mum must have forgotten to take it home with her just after Michael arrived. Ryan's sister had insisted she go home, there was nothing they could do. If anything happend the doctor's would call him, Megan promised to stay behind and wait in the waitingroom to give him some privacy.    
  
He sits down in the chair next to the bed. The chair he is sure his mother has spent sitting in the last several hours mostly likely worried sick about her eldest son.  Ryan looks like he is asleep, if it hadn't been for the tube down his throat you wouldn't know anything had happend.  But the constant beeping of the machine brings Michael back to reality, that Ryan could have died, might still die.

He racks his brain for things to say, he knows Ryan can't hear him but if he doesn't the beeping of the machine is going to make him go insane. ''Will you wake up if I promise to come back'' he asks eventually. There is no reply. ''I should probably come back just to keep you on your toes'' he continues ''Or we can go kick some French ass''.  He sighs ''I missed you I want us to be friends again'' he eventually says ''Please Ry wake up. You can't quit come on dude''  Michael says his voice starting to shake again the only reply is the beeping of the machine.  Looking at Ryan in this condition is too painfull so he gets up and makes his way over to the bag in the corner hoping there is something in there to keep him distracted.

He opens the zip and rummages through it finding several candy bar wrapper and the first part of Lord of the Rings. He smiles despite the situation, he remembers Ryan having gotten the book just before he left for Athens back in 2004 saying he was going to read it on the flight. In the end he spent most of the time talking to Michael and coming up with random shit to pull once they got to the village.  The book looks brand new but the receipt lodged between the cover and the first page indicate it is indeed the same book. It looks like it has never been opened.  It wouldn't suprise him if Ryan just kept it in his bag in the hope that one day he would get round to reading it. Michael puts the bag back down and makes his way back to the chair.

He sits down and pulls the chair closer to the bed.  He leans into Ryan and rest his elbows on the bed as he turns to the first page of the book. He takes another look at the machine that is back to a steady beep before taking a deep breath

''When Mr. Bilbo Baggins of Bag End announced that he would shortly be celebrating his eleventy-first birthday with a party of special magnificence, there was much talk and excitement in Hobbiton.'' He looks over at Ryan still lying motionless in the bed

''You better wake up soon because like hell am I ready the whole book'' he jokes trying to take some of his own tention away.

''It gonna be okay, I am here'' he says not sure who he is saying it to. He looks back down at the book and starts to read again. His voice and the beeping being the only two sounds in the room

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is kinda angsty, sorry for any feels caused

Michael wakes up the next morning with a gentle shake from Megan. "You been here all night" she asks as Michael yawns and stretches. The room is bright and he can see the sn is already up ''What time is it'' he asks yawning again''

''Just gone nine'' Megan replies ''You slept in that chair?'' Michael nods removing the blanket the nurse had given him last night.

"I didn't want to leave him" Michael replies rubbing the sleep from his eyes "I didn't mean to fall asleep" Michael says looking guilty.

Megan sits down in the chair on the other side of the bed "It's okay, you are here that's all that matters"

"I wish i could do more" Michael says "I feel so helpless"

Megan nods "So do I, this isn't Ry I dont think I have ever seen him not moving or speaking for this long a period of time."

Michael smiles "Tell me about it he even talks in his sleep. I always got stuck rooming with him"

"You loved it admit it" Megan replies.

Michael nods looking over at Ryan "I swear though if you ever tell him that I will deny it."

"I think that is what he is gonna miss the most" Megan smiles sadly "He is going to miss you being his friend"

"I am still going to be his friend" Michael says sounding hurt.

Megan nods "I think'' she says looking at Ryan before continuing '' I think he thought now you finished swimming and you started palying golf and dating this model you wouldn't have time to be his friend"

"Me and her we broke up" Michael says looking back down at Ryan.

"Sorry" Megan replies and Michael shrugs "But I am always going to have time for him" Michael says sighing "I didn't know he doubted how much his friendship means to me."

Michael sighs again"Maybe that is why he hasn't been returning my texts"

"I though you were't returning his" Megan says quietly. Michael shakes his head but doesn't reply. 

''He just...I don't know just...like he said his heart broke a little when you retired'' Megan says quitly.

"When is your mum getting here?" Michael asks after a couple of moments of silence.

Megan looks at her watch "Going to go down to collect them in a few minutes"

Michael nods and starts to get up "I better go then leave you and the rest of your family in peace"

"Stay" Megan says "Ryan would want you to stay."

Michel stays standing "I don't think Ryan will want me to stay judging how he won't even return my texts" he replies trying not to show how hurt he is at the revelation that Ryan thought he wasn't his friend anymore.

"I would like you to stay" Megan says and Michael knows there is no point in objecting because Ryan has told him enough about Megan to know you listen to what she tells you to do.

Michael sits back down "Are you sure" he asks. Megan nods

"Thank you" he says biting his lip and looking back over at Ryan.

"Michael I don't know what happened between you and Ry but whatever it is please just be friends again because Ry hasn't been himself since London"

Michael avoids Megan gaze and plays with the corner of the cover on the bed "I wish I knew what is up with Ry I wish I knew how to fix him"

Megan stands up when Michael doesn't continue "I better go see if Mum and Kris are here, I will be right back".

"I will keep an eye on Ry" Michael says "Make sure he behaves himself"

Megan nods neither laughing but the tension is slightly less than it had been yesterday. Michael watches Megan leave the room and looks back down at Ryan.

 

 

"You really thought I was going to stop being your friend Doggy?" Michael whispers scared someone might hear him. "Dude you ain't getting rid of me that easy. I didn't mean to give you the feeling that i wasnt your friend anymore."

Michael pulls out his mobile phone and opens his playlist "Maybe I should play some Lil Wayne to liven things up a bit" he smiles playing the first Lil wayne song on his playlist. He puts his phone on the table next to Ryan's bed and leans back in the chair.

"You better wake up soon or I am going to have to rap" Michael says nudging Ryan gently "I will not be held resposible for any damage caused to your ears". Even though Ryan isnt replying Michael finds it calming talking to Ryan like he can hear him.

"This is weird" Michael says leaning on the bed "You being this quiet, not having a comeback". Michael says fixing the blanket up so more of Ryan is under covered.

"This is the longest time I have actually been able to talk without you interfering. Not that I mind"

Michael waits for the song to end before grabbing his phone of the table to look for another song when he sees that he has received over a hundered messages since he left Baltimore yesterday.

"People are worried about you dude, like seriously worried'' he says "You have know idea how many messages I have gotten asking how you are. Natalie already phoned me twice but I can't bare to answer because i don't know what to tell her." Michael says sadly.

"And your mum is worried sick dude, like you gonna have to wake up or she will probably ground you" Michael says trying to laugh at his own joke but it turns into a choked sob.

He takes a deep breath and reaches over to the book he had left on the bedside table the nigth before.

"Excuse me" an elderly gentle man says Michael presumes is Ryan's doctor "I need to examine Mr. Lochte before I send him up for another MRI" he says taking Ryan.'s notes from the end of the bed

Michael's eyes go wide "Another one? Why is there something wrong" Michael asks trying not to sound like he is panicking.

The doctor looks up "I am sorry sir but I can't discuss Mr. Lochtes medical condition if you are not family''

"I just want to know if he is ok" Michael says trying to stay calm.

"I know but I am not allowed to diverge that information".

Michael nods "His mum is going to be here any minute I think she would like to see him before you take him up to the MRI"

The doctor nods and puts the notes back "I will get someone to pick him up in a few minutes" the doctor walks towards the door but turns beforen he opens "Mr. Phelps this is off the record if the MRI shows that the swelling has gone down enough we are going to try to take out the breathing tube and see if he is strong enough to breath on his own".

Michalel smiles resisting the urge to hug the doctor "Thank you" the doctor nods and opens the door and leaves the room.

He sits in silence for a few minutes flipping through the book debating if he should carry on reading.

 

 

"Michael" he hears a voice behind him, he turns to see Ryan's mum standing in the doorway.

"How are you? Did you manage to get any sleep?" Michael asks standing up and offering her his seat.

"A little" she replies sounding exhausted "Thank you for keeping an eye out. How was he?".

"Nothing changed since you left"

Ike nods "The doctor told me they are going to take him up to do an MRI and they are going to see if he can breath on his own"

''Where is Megan?'' Michael asks when he realises Ike is alone.

''I told her to go home, Megan and Kristen have been great but the have families of their own to take care of right now. It is no point for them hanging round in a hospital waiting room''

Micahel walks ocer to the other chair and sits down. They sit in silence until the porter comes to take Ryan up for his MRI.

"Did the doctor say how long it is going to take before they know the results" Michael asks once the porter and Ryan have left the room.

Ike nods "They should know in a few hours. Will you stay I think Ryan would like to see a familiar face when he wakes.

Michael's hearts sinks Ryan obviously has been retending that everything was allright. Ike looks like her world is on the verge of falling apart and for a moment he has think of his own mum and how should would be in the same state if it was him lying in that bed.

"He is going to be okay" Michael says not directing it ar anyone "He has to be"

Ike nods "Where you reading that?" she asks pointing at the book in his hand. Michael looks down at the book. "Figured I'd read it to him seeing as he hasn't really got anything else he is able to do" Michael sighs "It is stupid I know but i just...." he trails of looking at the door.

"It is okay dear, last night I cooked his favourite meal and freezed it in so he could have it when he comes home. It stupid i know but.."

"It means he has to come back" Michael says looking back over at Ike "I am going to keep reading until I reach the last chapter'' Michael bites his lip  ''He is going to have to wake up if he wants to know how it ends"

Ike smiles "Sounds like a good plan." She looks around the room "I don't know about you but this room is driving me up the wall want to go get something to eat?"

Michael shakes his head "I am good"

Ike gives him a stern look the same looks his mum gives him when he was a teenager and he pulled some random shit "When did you last eat?"

Michael thinks for a moment before answering "Yesterday on the plane I had a sandwich I think"

"Well then" Ike says standigng up "You and me are going to have some breakfast I wouldn't be a good mum if I didn't take care of Debbie's youngest now would I."

Michael starts to protest but Ike just holds up a hand indicating she is not going to take no for an answer "And while we eat your gonna have to explain this newfound love for golf, because i have been trying to follow it but I just can't make head nor tails of it"

Michael smiles as he stands up "I will have breakfast but only if you allow me to pay"

Ike nods "Just this once though" she replies as she and Michael make tehre way out of the room

 

 

By the time they return Ryan is back in the room. The breathing tube hasn't been removed. The doctor is looking at the notes. Michael doesn't speak and feels guilty about making Ike ask how Ryan is.  He just keeps staring at Ryan only registering every few words the doctor say about  _still some swelling_ and  _concerned about slow heart rate_.  The doctor finally leaves and Ike and Michael are left alone in the room with Ryan.

''Ryan you going to have to wake up now'' Ike says sitting down next to the bed ''You need to wake up because I am worried, Michael is worried''  she sobs.  Michael can feel his heart break as he sits opposite Ike.

''Dude you shouldnt worry your mum, that's not cool'' he says to Ryan. 

Ike take hold of Ryan's hand ''I love you'' she whispers kissing his forhead.

She looks up at Michael ''If you need to go..'' she starts to say but Michael cuts her off ''I am going to stay until he is allright no matter how long it takes.

 

 

The machine starts beeping eratically starteling both Ike and Michael who had fallen asleep next to the bed. Michael panicks and hits the button for the nurse.

Michael waits till one of the nurses comes in and busies herself checking Ryans vitals before one of the doctor's comes in and asks Michael and Ike to step outside.

Michael makes Ike sits down in one of the empty chairs outside and they both wait for the doctor to bring news, he sees  Devon come down the hall and he immediatly realise that something is wrong.

"What happend" he asks sitting down next to his mother.

Michael looks over at Ryan's room "His heart it just, the machine started beeping and I got send out of the room"

Ike lets out a sob "My baby" she says letting her head rest on Devon's shoulder.

"It is going to be all right, Ry is going to be allright" he whisper looking over at Michael.  Both exchanging a look that means neither know if Ryan is going to make it or not. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter turned out shorter than planned but i wanted to post something today, will post chap three in the next week or so


	3. Chapter 3

Michael feels like an enternity goes pass before the doctor comes to give him an update. Michael holds his breath when he sees the doctor exiting the room, every fiber of his body is wishing Ryan is still alive.

"Mrs Lochte" the doctor says and Ike looks up, her eyes red from crying. "Your son started breathing on his own and triggering the machine"

"He is breathing on his own?" Michael asks with a sigh of relief "That is a good thing right?"

The doctor nods "We removed the tube and we are running some more test but it looks positive."

Michael lets out another sigh of relief and is hit with enormous tiredness.

"Can I see him?" Ike asks.

"Mr. Lochte is still very weak so I can only let one in to see him each time. Try not to get him to talk to much because his throat is still raw from the tube."

"Thank you doctor" Ike says standing up and shaking the doctors hand.

"We will wait here" Devon says once the doctor has returend to Ryans room "You go see Ryan". Ike nods

"I have never been more scared in my entire life than i had been when I saw the look on my mums and your face" Devons says once his mum has entered Ryans room.

"I never fellt so scared when I heard that machine go off. I thought he was going.."

"It's okay " Devon says putting his hand on Michael's shoulder "Ryan is going to be okay. He is strong and he is going to pull through."

Michael nods and they sit in silence for a few minutes.

"You should go see him next. I don't think he will want to see me. I will wait if you want I can drive you home on my way to the hotel" Michael says as he sees Ike exsiting Ryans room.

"How is he?" Devon asks standing up.

"Good, he is tired but the doctor says that is to be expected. The MRI showed the swelling to have gone down but they still need to keep an eye on him because of the concussion but the doctors are positive".

"I am going in to see him and then we should get you home." Devon says to his mum "Michael you can stay with us if you want no need checking into a hotel"

"Thank you" Michael says relieved he doesnt have to go to an empty hotelroom. Devon walks over to Ryan's room and Ike sits down next to Michael.

 

"Hey" Devon says entering the room "Look who has finally decided to wake up" 

"Shut up" Ryan replies hoarsly but with a grin.

Devons sits down in the same chair Michael had been sitting.

"It is good to have you back" Devons says quietly. Ryan replies with a smile.

"Did mum tell you Michael is here?" Devon asks. Ryand nods gently.

"He has been woried, he looks like a lost puppy" Devons says "Well a lost baby goat" he adds with a grin.

Ryan rolls his eyes "He still here?" he croaks

Devon nods and stands up "Going to send him in before we leave. Be nice" Devon says walking over to the door. Ryan doesn' reply.

 

"Yo dude wake up" Devon says shaking him lightly. Michael opens his eyes and look up at Devon.

"You ready to go?" Michael asks getting ready to stand up.

"Not until you go to see Ryan" Devon replies "Told him you were here and that I was going to send you in to see him"

Michaels eyes go wide "What!? What did he say"

"It wasnt a question i just told him" Devons says sitting down.

''But..'' Michael starts to say. Devon rolls his eyes "Just go"

 

Michael takes a deep breath and walks over to the room. He pauses momentarily infront of the door gathering the courage he needs to go in.

The room is dark and the curtains are drawn, Ryan is sitting up more than the last time he saw him and his eyes are closed.

"Hey" Michael says softly once he has reached the bed. Ryan opens his eyes and turns his head to look at Michael.

"Hi" Ryan replies his voice sounding hoarse. Michael sits down in the chair not sure what to say.

"Thank you for looking out for mum" Ryan says breaking the silence.

Michael nods "It is no problem, you would have done the same''.

Ryan turns his head away again "Mum said you were here all night"

"I wanted to make sure you were ok, you are my friend and I was worried"

Ryan bites his lip and nods closing his eyes again "My head is killing me"

"The doctor told us that that is because of the concussion. Try not to speak" .

Ryan just nods. Michael sits in silence for a few minutes before breaking the silence "I better go let you get some rest. Can i come back to see you tomorrow?" he asks.

Ryan opens his eyes and turns to face Michael before nodding.

Michael smiles "Get some sleep doggy" he says standing up "I will come visit tomorrow"

"Bye" Ryan whisers as Michael makes his way out of the room.

 

When Michael returns the next morning Ryan is sitting up in bed. The curtains are still drawn but Ryan looks more like himself than he did last night.

"Hi" Michael says standing in the doorway "How are you?"

"Better than yesterday the doctor gave me something for my headache, still tired though the nurses had to wake me up every hour because of the concussion." Ryan replies his voice back to normal "You can come in though" he says when Michael stays standing in the door way.

Michael smiles and makes his way over to the chair next to the bed "The doctor says you can talk again".

"Yeah well my mum was just here and i couldn't get a word in edge ways" Ryan replies.

Michael nods "She was worried. I think she is happy you are awake"

Ryan doesnt't reply "I am glad you are awake" Michael adds "I was worried. Doggy if you want me to go I will go. I mean I know you don't want to talk to me so if you want me to leave just say so. But i just wanted to let you know I still think of you as my friend, my best friend." Michael says not pausing to catch his breath.

Ryan looks over at Michael and swallows "I don't want you to go, I still want to be your friend I just figured we were only friends because we swam together."

"Dude you and me are always gonna be friends no matter what"

"Sorry" Ryan says after a while "I was a douche for not texting back"

"Shall we just forget about it" Michael asks "You should focus on getting better"

Ryan nods but grimaces.

"Your head hurt" Michael asks worried "You need me to get anything or want me to call anyone"

"No the nurse is gonna bring some painkillers in a bit, I just keep forgetting that movement makes the pain worse. The doctor says the headache can last for a bit just glad that is all it could have been worse"

Michael nods

"I mean if i had to choose between headaches and death, i choose headaches" Ryan jokes and Michael lets out a loud laugh that causes Ryan to wince

"My brain doesn't like light or loud sounds at the moment" Ryan says when he sees Michael's worried face "Guess i should probably not make you laugh" Ryan says with a smile.

Michael returns the smiles "Glad to see you haven't lost your sense of humour"

Ryan jawns "Stupid painkillers are making me sleepy" he says apologetically "Can't seem to stay awake"

"It is okay I mean it is to be expected, I can come back later if you want"

"I would like that and maybe you could read some more to me" Ryan says pointing to the book next to the bed.

"Wait you heard me"

"Dude I was in a coma, no my mum told me" Ryan says rolling his eyes.

"Will read some more when i come back, get some sleep doggy" Michael says akwardly standing up.

"Could you smuggle in some mountain dew?" Ryan asks "Like could serious use something that isnt water or water with a fruit taste"

Michael shakes his head "Pretty sure your doctor won't approve of that but I will see what I can do."

"Oh and some domino's pizza" Ryan asks innocently with a grin

"Well the concussion hasn't affected your appetite" Michael laughs softly "I will try to get some mountain dew but i draw the line at pizza."

"But" Ryan whines but Michael just shakes his head "Get some sleep I will be back"

Ryan sinks back further into the bed and closes his eyes. Michael walks back out into the hall were Ike and Kristen are waiting for him.

"He is tired I told him I will be back later" Michael says "He seems to still have his appetite he wanted me to smuggle in some pizza

Ike smiles "I don't think Ryan is ever going to lose his appetite"

Michael nods "If he ever does I am going to be worried.''

''Lets go get something to eat'' Ike says standing up ''You look famished''

Michael nods as he follows Ike and Kristen to the carpark.

''You and Ry friends again'' Kristen says as they wait for the lift.

Michael nods ''Yeah i think we are'' he replies with a big smile

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope all the medical stuff makes sense :)  
> all mistakes are my own


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry it has taken so long  
> My laptop decided not to save the original work so had to rewrite and couldnt remember everything

''Tada'' Michael says triumphantly as he puts a can of mountain dew on the small table at the end of Ryan's bed.

Ryan is laying with his head under the covers and doesn't reply. Michael gives him a gentle nudge.

''Fuck off'' Ryan mutters.

''Charming'' Michael says sitting down and putting his feet up on the bed ''I go through all this effort to get you your gross drink and this is how you thank me''

 Ryan removes the covers and looks up at Michael ''Oh it is you. How long have you been in Florida?'' he says sitting up.

''Me?'' Michael asks ''I have been here since you were admitted Ry'' Michael replies sounding worried.

''Oh'' Ryan says looking over at the can and sounding confused ''Whats that?'' he says still looking at the can.

Michael looks over at Ryan ''You asked me to bring it in remember''

Ryan sighs ''The doctor said I might have some trouble with my short term memory as a result of the concussion.''

''Well let me introduce myself'' MIchael says moving the chair closer to the bed ''I am Michael Phelps the guy that kicks your ass in the pool'' he replies with a grin holding out his hand.

Ryan smiles ''I said short term memory as in a few days. Still can remember kicking your ass in the 400IM''

Michael leans back agains the chair as Ryan shifts onto his back and stares up at the ceiling.

''Who did you think i was?'' Michael asks after a while.

''Devon'' Ryan exhales ''We had a disagreement just before you came in and I said somethings....I wasn't too nice to him'' Ryan says biting his lip.

''About what'' Michael asks reaching over to get the can.

''Nothing it is not important, when do you have to go back?'' Ryan asks as Michael opens the can and hands it to him.

Michael pulls out his phone and opens his emails ''Yesterday'' he replies with a smile ''I should probably go tomorrow but wanted to make sure you were okay before I left''

Ryan nods but doesn't say anythng.  Michael notice the blinds are still closed but the light on the other side of the bed is on which means Ryan's intolarance for light must be improving.

''So'' Michael says tapping his foot against the side of the bed ''Now what?''

Ryan looks over at the book on the bedside table ''You could read'' he replies with a grin.

Michael reaches over and Ryan adjust the bed till he is lying down.

''I can't remember where I left off'' Michael says looking through the book.

''Start at the beginning?'' Ryan asks

Michael groans ''But like I already read that part''

''Yeah well I was in a coma so I win''

Michael flips him off ''Fine'' he huffs

Ryan grins ''Thanks MP''  
  
Michael just shakes his head ''Thank god I am leaving tomorrow'' he says opening the book on the first page and claring  his throat. He looks over at Ryan who is lying with his eyes closes but Michael can seehim clenching his jaw. He resist the ururge to ask if Ryan ok and begins to read instead.

 

 

 

Michael walks into his kitchen scratching his stomach and places his laptop on the kitchen counter. He looks at his kitchen and wonders how he could have gotten it into such a mess in the few short days he has been back from his work for his foundation.  He opens the fridge hoping one of his sister has stocked it with food for him but before he get the chance to look inside his phone rings.

''What's up'' Michael replies when he sees Devon's name pop-up on the caller ID.

He hears a loud groan ''Ryan is driving me up the fucking wall dude''

Michael lets out a loud a laugh ''How is the patient'' he asks opening the fridge to examine the content. 

''The patient is Ryan'' Devon replies

''No'' Michael replies closing the fridge door.  And opening one of the cupboards to see if there is something in there to eat.

''No what'' Devon asks innocently

''You were going to ask if I would come to babysit Ryan'' Michael chuckles ''Dude no way''

Michael can hear Devon think ''Please Michael he is in a rotten mood, mum has been in tears and I seriously can't take care of him and study'' Devon says desperatly.

Michael feels the seriousness of the situation when he hears the tone ''Ryan is ok'' he eventually asks.

He hears Devon take a deep breath ''It is worse than he is letting on, he is in a lot of pain and has a lot of side effects of the concussion'' Devon takes another deep breath ''I just figured he could do with a friend right now to keep an eye out, I mean I am his baby brother he isn't going to take notice of me and take it easy''

Michael closes the cupboard ''I will be on the first flight out Dev'' he replies looking down at Herman and Stella who finally forgiven him for leaving them with his mum who doesn't let them get away with half the stuff he lets the get away with.

 

  
The house is dark when Michael arrives. He has never seen Ryan's house this quiet normally whenever Ryan has him over some kind of party going on. He thanks the taxi driver and gets out. He takes a deep breath and walks up to the front door. Devon had told him to text when he was outside instead of ringing the doorbell. He sends Devon a texts and a few minutes later 

''Hey' Devon whispers motioning for Michael to come in.

''Where is Ry'' Michael asks in hush tone.

Devon points upwards ''Been in bed all day, his headaches are getting worse''.

Michael nods ''I thought he had painkillers''

Devon shrugs and walks into the kitchen ''He is refusing to take them'' he says opening the fridge and pulling out a bottle of water and handing it to Michael ''He says he doesn't want to anything in his body that could come up positive on a drug test even though the pain is torture''

''Is that why you asked me to come, talk sense into him'' Michael asks taking a sip of water ''Cause you and I both know I am the last person he is going to listen to''

Devon sighs ''Mum is worried and I can't cope taking care of him, you and him are close. Even though you won't be able to convice him at least you and him are stubborn fucks so you are able to put up with him for longer''.

Michael chuckles ''Anything else I need to know''

Devon walks over to one of the cupboards ''His painkillers are in here, he still can't bare loud sounds or light and he is tired as shit.''

Michael nods 

''Good luck'' Devon says picking his bookbag of the kitchen counter ''If you need anything just text. He still hasn't had anything to eat all day. Perhaps you can get him to eat a bit'' Devon says as he and Michael walk towards the front door ''And check on him when he is asleep you know...'' Devon pauses and bites his lip ''Like you don't need to wake him just like make sure he is breathing and shit'' Devon says.

''Will do, will text you later to give you and update'' Michael says as Devon steps outside ''He doesn't knw you are here, I figured if he knew he would protest so I didn't tell him sorry''

Michael puts a hand on Devon's shoulder ''It's okay Dev, I will keep an eye out you go home get some sleep you look like you need it''

Devon nods and walks down the path. Michael closes the door and rest his head against the door trying to figure out what to do next.

''Dev is that you'' he hears Ryan says coming down the stairs.

Michael looks up ''Hey'' he replies softly ''Dev had to study so he asked me to come''

Ryan rolls his eyes but immediatly pulls a face ''You shouldn't have come, I can take care of myself'' Ryan protests.

''Ry'' Michael says softly ''Just shut up and let me take care of you okay, I haven't always been a good friend let me do this''

Ryan thinks for a moment before slowly nodding ''Ok but like only for a few days and then you are back to celebrating your retirement''

MIchael nods ''Deal''.

Ryan sits on a stool at the kitchen counter as Michael turns to open the fridge ''But first I am going to cook you dinner'' Michael smiles.

Ryan traces circles on the counter ''We could order pizza''

''Or I could make like some or something'' Michael counters

''Or we could order pizza'' Ryan tries again. 

Michael shakes his head ''Gonna make soup'' he replies pulling out some tomatoes ''Have you got herbs and a blender''  
  
Ryan points to the cupboard above the sink ''I think they are in there but not sure if i have a blender. I think maybe in one of the cupboard under the sink.''

Michael nods and squats down to look in the cupboard under the sink ''Gotcha'' he replies thriumphantly and Ryan just groans.

''What?'' Michael says putting it on the kitchen counter ''I can cook believe it or not''.

Ryan still doesn't look sure ''Okay but don't burn down my kitchen. Going to have a lie down call me when you have fucked up, realised you can't cook, order pizza and it has arrived'' Ryan smiles.

Michael grabs a tea towl and throws it at him.

''Hey'' Ryan exlaims ''I am the patient don't be mean'' he laughs throwing the towl back''

Michael smiles ''Will call you when the soup is done''.

 

 Ryan makes his way down the stairs to see his kitchen still in tact and not a burnmark in sight.  Michael had layed the table and is putting the finishing touches to his concoction that to Ryan's dismay actually smells pretty good.

''Sit down'' Michael says when he notices Ryan hovering in the kitchen door ''Soup is ready, hope you are hungry'' Michael smiles ''I made lots just incase you have your appetite back''.

Ryan nods and walks over to the kitchen counter where Michael has layed out a glass and a can of mountain dew. Ryan smiles as Michael brings over the bowl of soup and sets it down.

''Hope it is not to hot'' Michael says sitting down opposite Ryan.

Ryan nods ''Smells good''

''Thanks'' Michael grins and Ryan rolls his eyes as he picks up his spoon. 

He stirrs his spoon a few times before a small smile creeps across his face ''Ehm MP you did actually add something other that tomatoes and herbs right''  
  


MIchael nods ''I added in a bit of milk to make it creamy, just a drop though''

''So basically you made pasta sauce'' Ryan says spooning some up and letting it fall back into the bowl ''MP this isn't soup, it looks like ...I am not sure what it looks like to be honest''

Michael bites his lip before taking a bite and spitting it back into the bowl ''Ok so maybe I can't cook soup'' he grimmaces.

Ryan chuckles and pushes the bowl away ''Pizza'' he replies cheerfully.

Michael rolls his eyes ''Fine but just don't tell Dev I promised to take care of you''

''Jeah'' Ryan smiles ''Pizza!''

Michael smiles.

''What'' Ryan asks unsure.

''Nothing I am just glad....I am really glad we are friends again'' Michael says with a small smile ''I missed you''

Ryan nods ''Thanks for coming, I am happy we are friends again''

Michael gets up to hug Ryan but Ryan pulls away ''So pizza'' he says as he goes to look for his phone leaving Michael standing in the kitchen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I still firmly believe MP cant cook.....
> 
> please let me know if there are any mistakes


End file.
